Friday Feb 15th
Went in for a cervical gel treatment at 10am, and the plan
was to leave right after, spend
the day running errands, hanging out with mom, and being active to help trigger
the gel and get things ‘moving along’.
As the nurse finished the treatment, there was suddenly a
ton of liquid coming out of me.
Her eyes got real big instantly, and then she simply said, “well, THAT’s
never happened before. Looks like you won’t be going anywhere now.”
Somehow, my water had been punctured and half of it leaked
out.. There was still a good amount inside so there wasn’t a huge rush to get
the baby out just yet.
I should’ve seen it coming, after having such an easy breezy
pregnancy, something was bound to happen.
Since “the plan” was NOT to be stuck in the hospital all
day, and I was there for a quick gel treatment---I had barely eaten or drank
anything that morning, so the nurse was having trouble finding a good vein—took
3 times sticking me to get something semi-decent.
My mom was able to head over soon after, meanwhile Cory was
at a jobsite 2 ½ hours away…of course.
They decided to just monitor me for a few hours and see if my body began the labor process on
its own.
Friday afternoon---still no dilating of any type. Dr. decides to let me eat something, but to keep it light….I’ll
take that, hallelujah!
Cory is here by now, and that was peace of mind for me.
They give me another “stronger” cervical gel around 5pm, and
decide to monitor my progress throughout the night. Nurse wants me to take Ambien “to help me sleep through the
night”, but luckily I had Cory there to think logically and say “no thanks,
she’s fine.” And yes, I slept just
fine…kind of! (having to pee constantly but needing to unattach/re-attach to
monitors and i.v. every time…)
Had minor contractions all Friday night- but no dilating.
That was my LEAST favorite part; getting checked every few
hours. Not just “discomfort” as they describe it…only ONE nurse did it
carefully without making me want to scream the entire time….she deserves an
award.
24 Hours later: Saturday morning 10 am
STILL no
dilating. Decide to begin some small zaps of Pitocin. Within 2 hours I have
dilated to a 4. My thoughts—“It’s
working!” It was just a matter of
time. I had made it clear that I
was very willing to have an epidural should I discover my pain threshold is not very high.
I’ve had 3 or 4 nurses by now. From Maria, to Koby, to Alicia—perhaps one more in between
there during the night shift. My
mom, Cory, and his mom Cindy are all still waiting in the room with me….a very
long day so far.
Finally felt the rest of my water officially “break”---so
now the clock is really ticking to get baby out before possible infections have any time to
set in.
Contractions are pretty darn big by now—and very
consistent. Dr. keeps coming in
and checking me every hour or two.
Contractions getting stronger, but every time I’M still just at a 4.
I am beginning to get very weak and exhausted, they keep me
on oxygen for a few hours. I
decide it’s epidural time---I knew at this point 2 things:
1. that no matter
what type of delivery it would become I had NO energy left and could barely breathe. and
2. I had
experienced enough to feel like I knew what labor felt like and did not “wuss
out”. I had had enough of a taste of labor pains to know how it feels—
Couple more hours go by….. I’m still at a 4. And baby’s heartbeat is getting weaker,
he’s getting exhausted too. They do a quick ultrasound to make sure the chord
isn’t wrapped around him. And put some inner device up there to more easily
monitor the intensity of the contractions/ his heartbeat… Right about now--
5pm-ish, Dr. and nurse Alicia come in to explain that after 6 hours of the
Pitocin, and no progress—the last option was to have a Csection within the next
hour or so. As they are
telling me this, I am actually relieved—just to know that there will be a
definite time of delivery to look forward to. It was not what I’d initially wanted as a delivery…but I was
so out of it and anxious to reach
the finish line .
My body suddenly became the weakest I have ever felt, and
was shaking uncontrollably. I told them I felt really strange, weak, dizzy. And
then the baby’s heartbeat became very faint, hard to find. Within moments, they
had a team called and put together, and were tossing Cory his scrubs to change into. They start wheeling me
out, and one of the surgeons is
asking me what kind of music I like, I tell her classical. I needed anything
that would relax and calm me down,
I couldn’t stop shaking!! Inside my head was like a tornado of emotions:
full-on freaking out, excited, scared, anxious, nervous, grateful, humble
(having everything out of your control will do that!)…but I'm so out of it to be able to show these emotions on the outside.
It happens so fast, thank goodness. The O.R. was freezing
and very bright. The blue fabric goes up, my wrists get strapped down, they numbed me more, I just try and listen to the music and breathe with the tempo of it, and then I feel
just a bunch of soft tugs and pulls –which we all know, definitely are NOT actually “soft” tugs and pulls.
Cory’s right there with the camera ready for anything worth
snapping. All I know is that they
started at 5:18, don’t know the exact minute they pulled Conrad out- but I do
remember the sound of his beautiful little perfect cry. The song playing at that moment was
perfect—“Hallelujah” sung by Il Divo--which is how I felt. The tears were streaming out uncontrollably, and the shaking stopped for a small while. I couldn’t see him, but Cory was watching him get cleaned
and capturing a few pictures of
the moment.
And then the nurse came around with him in her arms and laid
him on my chest. Oh!! What a marvelous feeling—to see those eyes, that face,
and to say ,“hello baby, I know you”… gave him many kisses, touched his
face---then they wheeled us out into a curtained area.
My neck had the worst pain in it, and I couldn’t move it or
use my shoulders/arms at all it hurt so bad. They wanted (as did I ) for me to
hold him and feed him, but I simply could not. The crazy shaking returned,
too. So Cory held him and bottle-fed him,
burped him while I laid there trying to relax and get warm. As Cory burped him, he lifted his head
and was looking left and right…! A very strong little fella.
I was running a temperature, so they followed “the protocol” and kept him in
the nursery for 24 hours, and had us both on antibiotics. They brought him in
to my room a couple times, though, thank goodness!
I loved Sunday night because then he was allowed to stay in
with me. That first time getting to feed him in the peaceful middle of the
night, the room barely lit and hallways all quiet…Cory asleep in the couch next
to me—that’s what I’d been longing for, how I imagined happiness to feel.
We stayed until Tuesday early afternoon. Getting to leave
the hospital felt great. My nurse, Leilani, gave me all sorts of samples/goodies and
sure took great care of me. From
stool softeners, to milk of magnesia, to bringing me my first ever suppository!! My body did not seem
to want to “do it’s business”, and I kind of worried because it was now Tuesday
afternoon (that’s 3 ½ days built
up/backed up). Hey, you chose to
read this- no one forced you!!! haha.
I am glad to now be past the “incapable” phase. It was sure
frustrating (and humbling) needing
someone to help me sit up, stand up, sit down, prop my legs on a pillow, get
up, walk, put on my socks for me, pull up my pants and undies - haha–put my socks on
for me … having a digestive system that is jacked up and uncomfortable….definitely
got a good preview of older age I
suppose!
It is a miracle that the body can
stretch and handle so much over 10 months, and then give you another teeny tiny
body, then slowly get itself back
to normal …well,
a “new normal”, that is.!!
I never realized how many movements
required use of your abs/core…and how much healing there was ahead over the
next few weeks. Thank goodness for
moms!! I had mine here with us for 5 days afterwards. BIG YAY!!! And she
basically did everything. Love my
mom..!
